Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Michelle Obama and Black Girls Rock! - Asian Guy Supports You!

First Lady Michelle Obama, I love your support for the "Black Girls Rock!" event! For far too long, Black females have been devalued, ridiculed, and shunned. From being told that their natural hair is messy and unprofessional, that their melanin-dense skin looks unattractive, and that they are undesirable partners, it's time that we flip the script.

To the haters...

...who say Michelle Obama is racist - It is NOT AT ALL RACIST for Michelle Obama to declare that Black girls rock. She was merely empowering a group of people who have been systematically and institutionally robbed of their opportunities to be regular girls and women. She did not say "Black girls are better than White girls." 

...who say #whitegirlsrock, #allgirlsrock, and anything with the intent of taking away the positive focus on Black girls - Your talking shit about #blackgirlsrock really shows the 6-year old in you. You're that 6-year old kid who has all the toys, but when you see a kid sitting next to you getting a toy, just ONE TOY, you shit your diapers, throw a fuss, and call the kid out for having one toy.

REALLY?!? How ignorant, uneducated, and selfish are you?!

Please, take off your Nikes and put yourself in Black girls' shoes. Really examine your #nonblackprivilege or your #nonblackgirlprivilege, and juxtapose that with the Black girl experience. What difference do you see?

If America hadn't oppressed Black girls and women, we wouldn't need to hold a "Black Girls Rock!" event, because Black girls would be treated comparably to that of White girls.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Nellie Andreeva and Deadline: Take Your White Fragility Elsewhere

REALLY, s co-editor-in-chief of Deadline, you should be ashamed of yourself for even considering writing how "ethnic castings" could be "too much of [a] good thing".

Hot Dough: Hollywood: Take Notes From The Walking Dead

It's like saying, "Universities nationwide had a 90% student population consisting of Whites up to now, but this past year, it's dwindled down to 80%. There are too many non-Whites attending Universities!! I think having 20% of non-Whites making up the student population might be too much!!"

"There are too many ethnic people!! I can't breeeaathe!!"
You, among other like-minded folks, seem to feel stressed that your White privilege, your entitlement, your White supremacy thinking, is being challenged. 

We don't tolerate ignorance. Please take your White fragility elsewhere - preferably not anywhere near communities and allies of ethnic people. 

P.S. - Read this: Dear Nellie Andreeva and Deadline, About Your Piece on Too Much “Ethnic Casting” on TV

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Hollywood: Take Notes From The Walking Dead

Dear Hollywood:

AMC's The Walking Dead (TWD) is "walking" in the right direction by taking a large leap towards diversity representation. It earned a cable record-breaking 17.3 million viewers for its 5th season premiere (best for a non-sports program). It started its 4th season with 16.11 million viewers and sealed itself as "the highest rated hour of cable television ever". It became the highest rated cable television show in its third season. And it set records with the 18-49 year olds going as far back as Season 2. Converting viewership to dollars, this means TWD can charge premium ad rates per slot. TWD's ad rate of $600,000/slot stirs up envy in the NFL, as its top games warrants it to charge $570,000/slot.

This is no accident either. According to Dr. Darnell Hunt's 2015 Hollywood Diversity Report, global box office revenue brought in $130.5 million for films that cast 31-40% of minorities, versus only $50.7 million for films that cast no more than 10% of minorities. Casting a number of minorities that, when combined, closely resembles the non-white demographic make-up of America translates to a nearly $80 million revenue difference!

TWD utilizes its cast to showcase diversity in more ways than just "race" - diversity of character roles and character development as they relate to "race", gender, sexual orientation, and age. I'm pretty sure there are many more areas of diversity TWD portrays, so feel free to add your input.

Here are some examples (spoiler alert!):
1. Tyreese is a gentle, sensitive caretaker

2. ...and he shows extreme heroism fighting through a horde of walkers without getting bitten!
3. T-Dog is not the first significant character to be killed off the show.

4. Michonne is a heroine - an adept leader with great intuition

5. ...and she was a mommy to her own

6. ...and she is a mommy to Judith

7. ...and she's sensitive. 

8. Sasha is...fierce! She's also a realistic leader

9. ...and she's fine!

10. Gabriel is nonviolent, non-aggressive.

11. Noah is a regular teenager.

12. Rosita (a Hispanic) is a walker killer who led the crew out of Terminus.

13. Daryl is a sensitive caretaker, just like Tyreese.

14. Aaron is an intuitive, tenacious leader...who happens to be gay!

15. Tara is a great team player...who happens to be a lesbian!

16. Carol is a heroine - an independent, strong leader...who is in her 40's.

17. Officer Lenner (above) and Deanna (below) are capable female leaders of their respective groups.

18. Glenn saves Tara on 3 separate occasions.
19. Glenn is also a strong leader and a team player...who delivered pizza before walkers became a majority "race"

20. ...and he stands up to bull.

21. Glenn is also a romantic

22. ...sexual

23. ...affectionate

 24. ...caring 

25. ...loving

26. ...romantic

27. ...passionate

28. ...protective survivor.

OK, now I'm done with Glenn.

Long story short, Hollywood, diversity sells. Let me repeat that. DIVERSITY SELLS.


Not your stereotypical Asian guy

Friday, March 6, 2015

7 Reasons Why Asian Men Should Date Black Women

In my quest of searching for reasons why Asian men should date Black women, I came up with...nothing. Yes, NOTHING. Not a single search entry gave me a legitimate reason for this coupling (unless I haven't searched hard enough, please enlighten me). And, no, Asian men and Black women should not date each other just because they are perceived as the least desirable partners in their respective sexes (I'll touch upon this later in this post). Therefore, I have decided to share my reasons as to why Asian men should date Black women, based on my experience dating a Black woman. Here's my disclaimer: not all Black women share all or any of these characteristics, but I will safely bet that a good number of them do.

1. FAMILY-ORIENTED. Brooke, my fiancée, maintains a close-knit relationship with her family, from talking with her sisters for long hours into the night, regularly spending time with and spoiling her nieces, and creating and upholding family traditions (e.g., Christmas and Fourth of July parties, Thanksgivings, Birthdays, game nights, etc.).
2. FRUGAL. Brooke does not come from a family that drives Porsches on a regular, nor does she tip waiters 50% of the bill every time she dines out. In fact, poverty is not an unfamiliar territory. Given her experiences, she spends wisely on needs and occasionally splurges for fun and cuddles. I am on the same page with her - we spend below our means. I have even learned a few money-saving strategies from her, like when she helped me spot a like-new blazer at a Goodwill store for less than $7.

Here's a little secret that I'm going to share with you (shhh! don't tell Brooke!): on our first date, I decided that she could be a potential wifey when, after the movies, she turned down CPK for a home-y meal. If I offer my date an expensive option, and she chooses to go with an alternative, less expensive option, that tells me that my date may be un-materialistic, financially astute, or...is on her period.
3. AGES WELL. You know how Asians get a fantastic rep for aging REALLY slow? Like, REALLY, really sloooooww? Yeah, well, Asians aren't the only people on the planet that ages well. Black women do too. Many of Brooke's family members look years younger than their age (not that I asked, but that's besides the point). Just to show you that aging well isn't exclusive to Brooke's family, I advise you to google these gorgeous ladies for yourself: Halle Berry (48 years old), Gabrielle Union (42), Tina Turner (75), Angela Basset (56), Taraji Henson (44), Tyra Banks (41). Ohhh, I should have warned you guys to whip out your lotion and napkins!

4. NOT A BIG DRINKER. Some women must have a drink for everything, like when preparing for a long day's work every morning with a mimosa, pairing chardonnay with a Lean Cuisine for dinner, or just because. Brooke does not drink alcohol, nor does she like the taste of alcohol. As for me...I have retired.
5. SUPPORTIVELY STRONG. The following two stories show how Brooke stands up for us. Brooke and I were held up in line at the grocery store one day. A man in his 30s or 40s behind us got irritated and told us to pay up and leave. I was talking to the attendant at the time, and Brooke responded to the man, "We're trying to get the issue resolved. If you want us to speed up, then pay for us. Or be patient and get back in line!" That alone put the man back in his place.

During our shopping experience at Costco, an elderly man in his 50s got irritated at me when I was pushing a shopping cart at the speed of traffic and bawled, "Move out of the f*cking way". There were many customers walking and talking, and Brooke heard his wailing. The man seemingly didn't get what he wanted, so he shouted to a Costco staff, "This guy is blocking everyone's way!" Brooke nudges me while making a universal gesture of "crazy" at the man, making sure he heard, "Baby, this guy is really crazy. Let's get out of here before he gets crazier."  The man's jaw dropped. Looking starstruck, he stood there speechless, then faded away into the crowd.
6. GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR. Brooke has a great sense of humor. When I asked her what she wanted for dinner, she said, "I want meat". I inquired further, "Me too. What kind of meat are you feeling?" "Your penis", she responded...hold on, I'll be right back.
Ok, now where were we? Oh, that's right, sense of humor. Brooke is a very laid back woman; she can turn a serious discussion of our dinner into a laugh factory. We would go off on tangents laughing over our inside jokes. Five minutes may have flown by, and we still wouldn't have figured out whether we wanted to eat in or eat out, because I'm busy talking about how I want to eat her pizza (meaning, the cat downstairs ;)).

7. WORKS HARD IN A RELATIONSHIP. While more than one study show that Asian men and Black women are the least desirable of partners, there is some positivity regarding the statistics that Asian men and Black women can savor (what can I say, I'm a half-full kind of guy;)).

In my observations, desirability has a positive correlational relationship with taking things for granted (TTFG). In other words, the more desirable Bob is, the more likely Bob will TTFG. This type of behavior may be related to entitlement/spoiled-ness/narcissism, but that is a topic for another discussion. In effect, Bob is more likely to, among other things, not pull his weight in a relationship, show less compassion and respect, and/or cheat.

However, the opposite is true. If I (ya, ya, I'm putting myself on the spot here) am perceived as less desirable, I find way(s) to compensate for my perceived undesirability. Since I cannot just simply change people's perceptions about my desirability, I do what I can control. I focus on maintaining a relationship, displaying compassion and love, and carrying my weight in bed as much as I do in a relationship. If the goings get tough, I don't just throw in the towel.

Asian men and Black women fall into this latter category of perceived desirability. My question is: What would happen if more Asian men and Black women dated? Imagine that!

Oh...and I haven't even touched upon the physical characteristics of Black women yet.